There's a time and a place to taste a bean but in my cup of tea is not it

I don't care what they do to soya milk to make it taste as far away from drinking blended beans as possible. Added chemicals, apple juice, sugar, I really don't care. Just so long as I can have a cup of tea and pretend I am normal, actually even enjoy it. I'm not fussy; brand, taste or cost, I'm just as happy with Tesco's Value as with Alpro's finest (which is rare as a particular trait of mine is being highly specific and rather anal about certain brands, especially when it comes to anything bean related, but I think I'm just happy that there's an alternative).

Whatever they do to every other brand of soya milk I have ever drunk they have not done with Sunshine Soya.

I thought it would be okay, buying a carton of soya from our local corner shop instead of trudging all the way to Tesco. I mean, soya's soya, can you really get it that wrong?

It appears so.

The first cup I thought one of my office worker's had mixed milk and soya accidentally, causing a rather unpleasant aftertaste but I persevered through at least half of it then was relieved of my tea drinking by my line manager who distracted me to go and eat marmite on toast.

So I thought I'd make another cup Post Toast. And, lets just say, it wasn't pretty.

It looks fine, looks like any other cup of soya: not quite right but passable as long as you avoid smelling/looking at it.

But the taste is frankly offensive. Vile. Absolutely bloody rancid.

It actually tastes like blended beans.

If there is tea in there I'm bloody hard pushed to find it. It leaves a rough texture on your tongue, like the husks are making a bid to remind your mouth for ever more of their passing presence. And the after taste - well, imagine a bean committing suicide (just bear with me). Dying a slow, painful death in my mouth, permeating every tastebud on my tongue.

I imagine the manufacturers thoughts went something along the lines that, yes it tastes rank but anyone who chooses to not consume meat and dairy produce should be denied the privileged of tasty food that they cast aside in their idiotic quest to veganism.

However, I think the short sighted manufacturers should have scoped out their competition and maybe, I know this is a bit of a crazy thought here, but perhaps tasted soya milk before they decided to force their inferior, and frankly offensive, produce on the masses.

I am now stuck with a whole carton of this bean juice (it does not deserve the coveted 'soya milk' label). And it was bloody expensive too (maybe having cheap tastes is the problem here. Bottle of white lightening anyone?). I've already had yet another cup and left yet another half of it and am feeling rather ill (I was giving it one final chance, to see if it perhaps had thought about what it had done and decided to redeem itself, or perhaps the beans had been allowed to 'settle', like a good wine being uncorked).

So its either an assault on the senses by a visit to Tesco tomorrow morning (resulting in late arrival at work) or a day of drinking black tea. Unless I give it just one more chance...